The most ideal situation would be to lose our virginity to the love of our life. Unfortunately, this rarely happens. Of course, that does not mean you need to sleep with anyone for the first time, since you will never forget the first sex, it is an event that is remembered for a lifetime, as well as the person with whom it happened. 

That is why it is most important that you make that decision for the right reasons. Sleep with someone because you want to, not because you feel pressure from a friend or maybe your boyfriend is persuading you to. People who lose their virginity for the wrong reasons often later regret what they have done. You are in no hurry, think carefully about such an important decision before you make it. 

It is very important that you are sober when having sex for the first time, and not under the influence of alcohol or drugs. Research has shown that most young people (both girls and boys) regret losing their virginity while intoxicated and so be careful not to make the same mistake. In any case, it is important to prepare well, both mentally and physically, so that unwanted consequences such as a minor pregnancy or sexually transmitted diseases do not occur later. And yes, you can get pregnant during the first sexual intercourse. 

For the first sex, it is best to choose a suitable place, where you will feel safe and relaxed, and where no one can just come across you. Therefore, for example a party in a house with a free room is not a good idea. 

In girls, hymen defloration (so-called “breaking”) occurs during the first sexual intercourse. The hymen is a thin layer of tissue (one to three millimetres thick) located at the entrance to the vagina. It partially covers the opening of the vagina and is part of the female vulva. The hymen can come in a variety of shapes, e.g., in the shape of a crescent, tooth, flap, but is most often ring-shaped. The edges of the hymen are smooth or wrinkled. It is common for most girls to experience minor bleeding and pain during their first sex (i.e. defloration), but on the other hand, this bleeding and pain does not have to happen at all. This does not happen only because in some cases the hymen has ‘torn’ previously, but because it is sometimes so elastic that it does not ‘tear’ or ‘tears’ only partially. This can happen when the first sexual intercourse takes place gradually, for example, when the boy uses his fingers first and only later switches to the ‘real intercourse’. 

If you start to bleed, it will not be profuse. Any bleeding you may experience is nowhere near what you experience during menstruation. Tearing the hymen should not be very painful. Even if you feel pain, it is because this feeling of penetration is a novelty that you are not used to, so your muscles have tightened. This is in no way caused by the hymen because there are no nerve endings in it. Although you cannot control how torn your hymen is, you can control your relaxation, which will then reduce your feeling of discomfort or pain.

One of the more common causes of pain during the first sexual intercourse is the fear of pain, but also the subconscious fear of possible pregnancy, which causes unconscious spasm of the vaginal muscles and then makes penetration difficult or impossible. Your boyfriend needs to allow you to relax with a lot of patience and attention, but that still takes a bit of time. 

Talk a lot with your boyfriend about everything. The first sex with a person you trust will also make the whole thing easier for you. Your boyfriend should take your feelings into account, he should do his best to keep that experience in your good memory and help you through the process. If he is persuading you too much or you have a feeling that he is forcing you – maybe it is time to think about whether he is the right person to be your first. 

And yes, of course you will be nervous for the first time, but do not panic.

Relax, breathe, go slowly, and remind yourself that it is normal to be a little nervous.

Being a teenager is not easy, especially when it comes to love, relationships, and sex. We present you the wrong moves that almost all of us made at least once. The only question is whether we have learned anything from those mistakes. Here are some of the most common:

1. Attempting to change the other person

This is a very common mistake. You notice something you do not like about your boyfriend / girlfriend and then you try to change that. Keep in mind that this is not good for the other person. If we love another person, we must love that person for who he / she is, not for what we would like that person to be. If you are trying to change someone who is not ready for that change, you can only achieve the opposite effect – additional quarrels, resentments, frustrations, and distancing. Instead, accept the person for who he / she is.

2. Excessive burdening

Young people often rush things, want to build a relationship in too little time and thus burden their relationships and suffocate the other person because they think everyone is the right one. Building a quality relationship with someone takes time, a lot of time. Rushing never brings anything good.

3. Neglecting your needs and friends

Many girls simply ignore their needs and friends after getting into a relationship. They stop hanging out, going out, participating in favourite activities, and over time – they move away from themselves. Boys do it less often. It is important that you do not forget and do not lose yourself in a relationship with another person.

4. Too much fear

Your past relationship hurt you, so you think it will be like that every time. It will not and it does not have to be. Sometimes you have to take risks. Fear can only hold us back from something potentially good. 

5. Not standing for yourself

This is one of the mistakes we often repeat. No one will stand up for you if you do not. You can be in love head over heels, but you cannot acquiesce to certain things. Disrespect is definitely one of them.

6. Convincing others that kissing someone else is not cheating

No matter who does it, cheating is cheating, and it can very well disrupt a relationship between two people. Recall the previous points and stand up for yourself in a situation like this.

Theoretically speaking, the so-called first love can happen at any age; however, the vast majority of people experience their first true love in adolescence. Adolescent infatuation is certainly an exciting new experience that we will probably remember throughout our lives.

Such infatuation greatly affects our daily functioning. 

Love relationships in adolescence are associated with intense emotional arousal and fantasies, especially in cases where the one we are in love with does not reciprocate our emotions. According to research, high school students spend between as many as five and eight hours a week thinking about their current or desired partner. How and when to concentrate on learning in addition to that?!

Romantic relationships in adolescence are very important since, similar to friendship, they satisfy one of the basic human needs – that of belonging to another human being. In addition, they contribute to the development of a young person’s identity, self-esteem, learning social skills and roles, and (in their happy form) are a source of happiness and satisfaction. Adolescent romantic relationships are much more often a source of strong emotions than relationships with friends, parents, siblings. Romantic relationships, as close friendship, apart from being a source of happiness and contentment, can also be a source of negative experiences and emotions. 

Unhappy adolescent infatuation can be very painful and can affect all areas of a young person’s daily functioning (school obligations, family, friends, leisure activities, etc.). Girls, compared to boys, are more affected by the inability to achieve a romantic relationship. 

Adults, unfortunately, very often do not take adolescent infatuation “seriously”, they have a need to belittle, criticize, or they need to give excessive advice. They often tell their children that they are still too young to feel such “adult” feelings, that the chosen person is not good for them, that they are not an appropriate couple, and they even try to get their child to stop seeing the person they are in love with. Of course, all of that is wrong. Wise adults can offer an adolescent appropriate conversation, support and the feeling that he / she is not lonely, that there will always be people around him / her who will love and accept him / her as they really are. “First love” is only the first lesson a young person must learn, but like the alphabet, it is at the core of all its future relationships.

Love is one of the most important things in life. It makes us happy, elated, and fulfilled. In order to choose a boyfriend or a girlfriend with whom we will be happy, we meet different people with whom we make emotional connections. However, if we are not satisfied and do not see ourselves with that person in the future, we end the relationship. Alternatively, our partner leaves us, which can be hard for us if we are madly in love. 

With a breakup, we deal as with any other loss, we have to go through stages of rejection, grief, and acceptance. Any breakup, at least while we still have some feelings towards our boyfriend or girlfriend, is difficult. 

Girls, compared to boys, are more affected by breakups or the inability to achieve a romantic relationship. Girls are more likely to feel loneliness, depression, and reduced life satisfaction, which is associated with the fact that girl establish deeper and more intense relationships, and by breaking this relationship they lose intimacy and support as factors that significantly contribute to life satisfaction. In contrast, boys on average do not enter into such deep and intense relationships, so the consequences of losing or not making a connection are not as negative as for girls. 

Breakup in adolescence will cause different consequences depending on what the young person attributes the breakup to. If we blame ourselves for a breakup, then the consequences of the breakup will be significantly more unfavourable because they endanger the self-esteem and self-confidence of a young person and can lead to the development of symptoms of depression.

It is important to remember that unrequited infatuation can be a very painful life experience, with possible consequences such as low self-esteem or even the development of symptoms of depression. Having that in mind, be careful in love relationships and be aware of the feelings of the person you are in a relationship with. If a breakup happened and you could not do anything about it, take your time and grieve for as long as you need, so that later you would be ready for new relationships and new beginnings. 

Painful sexual intercourse can have a number of different causes, physical and psychological in nature, and causes can range from bacterial infections to certain fears. 

The first sexual intercourse is often not the experience as the one we see in movies or with what we envision as an act full of love with the person we love. It is often quite the opposite of idyllic expectations and can be uncomfortable and painful.

The thing is, it is not talked about, so we cannot even know it. There are several reasons for pain and discomfort. The first is physical in nature – the female body needs more time to relax than the male. In addition, if you constantly expect pleasant feelings, and then do not experience them, then such thoughts burden you and it becomes a vicious circle, which then acts on your psyche. 

It is important that the boy and the girl talk about it a lot and clearly express their feelings to each other. If one of them is not ready for sexual relations, then the other should be told. The understanding we then gain can only strengthen the bond. 

There are cases where girls feel pain not only during the first, but also during the next sexual intercourses. One of the most common reasons for this may be the subconscious fear of pain that the girl felt during the first intercourse and with each subsequent intercourse, and in anticipation of the recurrence of that pain, the vaginal muscles begin to contract, and the pain reappears. Later, during intercourse, these muscles relax, there is no tension and cramping and the pain no longer occurs. The boyfriend can help with his patience and tenderness to relax, but also by making sure that the penetration is not with a complete erection, so that the pain will not occur or will be much less intense. It is nothing dangerous, it cannot hurt the uterus, which is located deeper, but if roughness is applied during sexual intercourse, pain and bleeding from the vagina can occur. With your attention and understanding as a boyfriend, you will help the girl to relax and the pain will completely disappear. 

Another possible cause of pain and discomfort during intercourse may be a subconscious fear of pregnancy.

That is why it is important to check if you are ready for sexual intercourse and if you have decided to engage in it, then take care of contraception in order to reduce the fear of pregnancy as much as possible. 

Sex is an inexhaustible topic about which much is known, but despite this, common misconceptions and myths about sex are still common, especially among adolescents:

1. You cannot get pregnant if you practice pull-out method

Before ejaculation, the pre-ejaculate is secreted – a fluid that contains sperm and can make you pregnant. 

That is why the pull-out method (coitus interruptus) is not really a method of protection against pregnancy, because in that way you can get pregnant, no matter how long (short) the intercourse lasted, especially during fertile days. The pre-ejaculate is a white fluid, which is secreted by the penis when a man is aroused. This occurs before orgasm and ejaculation. The amount of pre-ejaculate is different and the amount itself does not have too much of an effect. The pre-ejaculate performs its function even if it is only a few drops. The chance of pregnancy from pre-ejaculate is higher during fertile days and less during infertile days. If you wish to avoid pregnancy, do not use the pull-out method.

2. If I use some form of contraception, pregnancy can never happen

Be sure to keep in mind that no method of contraception is 100 percent safe. Used properly, the percentage of condom safety is 97%, pills 99%, with only condoms providing protection against sexually transmitted diseases. In addition, half of the cycle (usually the 14th day of the cycle) is one of the most fertile days, and then you should definitely use protection. 

3. She cannot get pregnant if intercourse is practiced during menstruation

The possibility of pregnancy is lower then, but it still exists. Furthermore, the female body is more susceptible to infections during menstruation so one should be careful and it is good to use protection. 

4. A condom will help you have sex longer

Incorrect. A condom will not help you last longer in sex. It depends more on experience and age. One extensive study found that men between the ages of 18 and 30 need an average of six and a half minutes to experience an orgasm, while men over the age of 50 need four and a half minutes. Wearing condoms did not affect their performance.

5. If you take a shower and urinate after sex, you will not get pregnant

This is a common misconception among adolescents, but there is not much logic if we recall what we learned in biology classes because the urinary and vaginal openings have completely different functions. If the pre-ejaculate or ejaculate has reached the vagina, all subsequent actions will not reduce the chance of a possible pregnancy. However, it is otherwise good to take a shower between two sexual intercourses, as it reduces the chance of sperm remaining on the body of a boy or a girl. 

6. You cannot get pregnant during the first sexual intercourse

The fact is that the chance of pregnancy exists if you have had your first period and if you and your boyfriend do not use protection. So, it does not matter if it is your first or hundredth sexual intercourse, you need to be careful and always use protection if you wish to avoid pregnancy. Better safe than sorry.

7. A girl must bleed during her first sexual intercourse

It is common for most girls to experience minor bleeding and pain during the first time (i.e. defloration), but this, on the other hand, does not have to happen at all. This does not happen only because in some cases the hymen has ‘torn’ previously, but because it is sometimes so elastic that it does not ‘tear’ or ‘tears’ only partially. This can happen when the first sexual intercourse takes place gradually, for example, when the boy uses his fingers first and only later switches to the ‘real intercourse’.